Eddie Dusick

     Well, now the time has come to talk about Eddie Dusick. I won't be too descript; so as to protect his privacy. I can't imagine he would want to be chatted about with people he doesn't even know - I know that I wouldn't. However, he is a HUGE part of my young life and to leave him out would be unnatural. I briefly mentioned Eddie back in my second post. I met Eddie Dusick when I was 11 years old. He was dating my cousin Laura who, once again, is the daughter of my godmother, Nancy Ligouri. He was so charming and so sweet and for whatever reason, he loved to tease me. I think I was just this little kid to him and yet I think because I was so envious of Laura, and I wanted to be just like her, that I automatically would have liked her boyfriend too. He was just a good guy. He was a combination of a big brother who liked to annoy you and the big brother that you looked up to? (In case you haven't figured it out, I've always felt like I've lost out in life because I never had a brother and I very often view a few really good male friends of mine, as my brothers. I guess it is a void I feel in my life.) Then something awful happened. Eddie was in an accident that caused him to lose control of his legs. I can still remember my mother telling me what had happened and I was so upset that I vomited. Honest. We were in our kitchen and I totally lost it. All I knew was that he could not die. I went into our hallway where my mother always had a statue of the Blessed Mother and I got on my knees and started praying. I remember my sister Michele saying sarcastically, "What are you doing?" and I ignored her. I had praying to do. I honestly don't remember what year his accident was, but I would guess 1973? (Please forgive me if I am wrong with any facts whatsoever Eddie; there are some parts of my story that are confusing with regard to timetables.)


     Eddie required an enormous amount of hospitalization and rehabilitation and all of this occurred while I was also in the hospital. I was fully aware of how massive and grueling his recovery was and yet.........he still didn't forget about me. I thought about him often and would ask my mother, "How is Eddie?" and she would tell me that he was working hard at recovery. Imagine.........you are a healthy man in your 20's, dating this absolutely beautiful (believe me when I tell you she was beautiful, inside and out) young woman, you get engaged to marry and life as you knew it, suddenly comes to a screeching halt. BOOM! Just like that. I can only imagine the physical pain he endured, along with the emotional part of acceptance, but somehow he managed to remember me and what I was going through.

     You won't believe this, but.........Eddie wrote so often to me while I was in the hospital. Yes, you are reading that correctly, HE wrote to ME! Here he was in this awful, awful situation and yet he made me a priority through his own turmoil. Unbelievable, huh? I would get so excited when I would receive a letter from him. One time I remember that I had a hard time understanding what he had written and saying so to my mother. I remember saying, "It's messy" and my mother telling me that he was also rotated on his stomach quite often and perhaps he may have written in that position and I was astounded (Don't know if that is even true Eddie, but I did have that conversation with my mother regardless). Oh my goodness, the correspondence was incredible and I felt a bond with him like I can't explain. Our situations couldn't be more different, yet were they really? Obviously in a defined sense, they were VERY, VERY different, but yet I do believe that in a broad sense, they were in fact very much alike? He didn't just do this for a couple of weeks or randomly, I received letters from him regularly and this went on for a very long time. I say all of this with the utmost respect, as I do fully understand that his turmoil was far greater than mine. Yet, in my mind, he was my big brother and I knew that he loved me and how I adored him.

     Very often, when I was having a bad day, I would re-read his letters and think of him. Often through the years, I have thought about those letters and I so wish that I had kept them. I don't really remember everything he wrote, but I do recall that I always felt better after reading them. I don't think I have ever thanked him properly, as I really only fully understand the significance of his attention now in my later years. Eddie Dusick gave of himself when a lesser man would have only been thinking of himself, and for that I will always be indebted to him. I was just his fiancé' 3rd little cousin or something. He owed me absolutely nothing, but he gave and he gave and he gave. What did he give me? Inspiration, when no else, and I do mean NO ONE else could. He saved me from many horrible moments and I love him dearly. As I said in my second post, few people have had a more profound impact in my life that Eddie Dusick and I have loved few more. He was an amazingly important person in my life and he always will be. He was another "brother" who I was never truly able to claim as my own, but he is in my heart ,where he will remain until my last breath.

     Now, so this doesn't end so philosophical (as all of you that know me, I can be very deep), I am going to tell you a quick story that explains the kind of guy Eddie is. Just so you can get a picture in your head. Sadly, I lost my cousin Cheryl Smith several years ago to breast cancer. Cheryl was the sweetest and funniest kid. I knew her more when I was younger, but while I was working at Westerly Jewelry in the 1980's, Cheryl came and worked for a short time. I don't remember if she was on summer break from college or it was over a Christmas vacation, but her and I became re-acquainted, so to speak, and we had so much fun together. I'll never forget her being mortified that I didn't like nor understand the game of football. I told her that so many people had previously tried to teach me, but I told her, "I am "unteachable". She claimed that was impossible and she was determined to teach me once and for all. She drew diagrams and kept repeating and repeating. This went on for weeks. Finally, one day, she looked at me with exasperation and said, "I give up! You really are unteachable!!" and we laughed and laughed and laughed. I still have no clue about the game of football!! Whenever I see a game on TV, I always think about Cheryl. It is still hard to believe that she is gone. Anyway, my sister Ursula, along with Aunt Mary, joined me to someplace in CT, to attend the wake. Now I hadn't seen Eddie is quite some time, years in fact, and literally the second I walked into the room I heard someone call my name. Loudly! Here he came zooming over in his wheelchair like he was entertaining in his home and people were staring. I'm sure they were wondering who the heck was this loud guy, at a wake no less, and I was a little taken aback because I could just feel people staring. I was worried that people would view me as disrespectful and I remember saying, "Shhh..." to him. I mean I was in a line for a very sad wake and here he was so happy to see us! Now, let me just say now - Eddie LOVED Cheryl. She was his favorite, I believe. He had a soft spot for her and they were very close. I know he was devastated at her death, but he just manages to grab each and every moment in life and live's it and seems to plunge through the more difficult parts of life, he just steams ahead full-force. He is very much a daredevil type. I remember he and I went outside for a few minutes later on and we spoke of Cheryl and how much he was going to miss her and what she meant to him and he cried. He is one of the most sensitive men you could ever meet. However, the point I want to make is that he is also so BOISTEROUS! So HAPPY! And loud! He is also absolutely lovable and when I was driving home that night I remember thinking that I am so blessed and so honored to know him and to be cared for by him. All I can say is, it's right back at ya MY Eddie!! So that is my Eddie Dusick story - I'm not sure if he wants’ to crawl under a table right now, embarrassed that I've raved on and on about him or he might just say, "I am pretty darn great, aren't I?" Ha! Ha! Whichever, I do adore this man and he is a very, very important part of my journey.